Ages 8-16 · Reading, PA metro area · Book 3, Confidence

Tryouts and Selection — Reading, PA

The Reading, PA metro area has about 440,072 residents, ranking 125th in the country. Every club in that number loses children who could have been good, in the first season, before anything was ever measured.

Including what happens to the children who are not selected, who have just been handed a verdict on themselves and no follow-up.

The book behind it

Ellis Abel and the Magic Triangle

“Turn fear into confidence, one step at a time.”

Commitment starts the cycle.
Practice builds real competency.
Confidence is earned through action.

Ellis Abel is a character series. Volume 3 carries the value confidence, and the story does the teaching. There is no doctrine in it and nothing for a family to opt out of, which is why it runs in Reading, PA in public schools, libraries, clubs and living rooms without changing a word.

Read about Ellis Abel and the Magic Triangle · The whole series

Five sessions in Reading

Session 1
Read the story and find the wall the child is standing under
Session 2
Commit out loud, before anybody feels ready — that is step one
Session 3
Do the reps, count them, and expect them to be ugly
Session 4
Name what got better, using the count and not a feeling
Session 5
Confidence is the last step, and it is earned in front of them

What Reading, PA leaders ask first

Is tryouts and selection in Reading, PA a religious program?

No. Ellis Abel is a character series. Each volume carries one named core value — this one is confidence — and the story does the teaching. There is no doctrine in it, nothing to opt out of, and it is used in public schools, libraries and secular programs as readily as anywhere else.

What ages does this work for?

Ages 8-16. The story is read aloud, so a child who cannot read yet is fully in it, and the discussion prompts are written in two bands so one adult can hold a mixed-age room.

When in a Reading, PA season does this fit?

Preseason for the first three sessions, then one mid-season and one at the end. Ten minutes before practice, sitting on the floor, is the whole footprint.

Our coaches are volunteers with no time. Is that a problem?

No. The script is one page per session and assumes the coach read it in the car park. The point is the athletes talking, not the coach presenting.

How a session actually runs in Reading

Step 1
Find the wall
Every child in Reading, PA has one thing they have stopped attempting, and they can usually name it in four seconds if an adult asks without a follow-up attached. The session starts there, with the actual wall, not a general conversation about effort.
Step 2
Commit out loud, before it feels reasonable
Commitment is step one because it is the only step available before anything else exists. It is said out loud, in front of people, and it is deliberately uncomfortable — a private intention is not a commitment, it is a wish.
Step 3
Reps, counted, and expected to be ugly
The middle step is the one every motivational version of this skips. Practice is boring and it looks bad, and a child who has been promised it will feel good quits at the third attempt. Counted reps make failure legible as progress rather than as verdict.
Step 4
Now the confidence, and name where it came from
At the end the adult points at the count, not at the child's mood. Confidence that is attributed to reps can be rebuilt the next time it disappears. Confidence attributed to talent cannot, and that is why praising talent makes children more fragile.

The rules that make it work

Confidence is earned, in that order, every time

Commitment, then competency, then confidence. Almost every adult teaches it backwards by trying to install the feeling first, and children can tell.

Ugly reps are the work, not a warning sign

A child promised that practice feels good quits on the third attempt. Say in advance that it will look bad, and the bad-looking part stops meaning anything.