Skip to content
Ellis Abel Learns.
Fear of Trying icon — Ellis Abel Learns Book 3, confidence, for children ages 4-12

Ages 4-12 · Book 3, Confidence · 4,299 places

Fear of Trying

For the child who has quietly stopped attempting things, which is the largest and least noticed version of a confidence problem.

Built on Ellis Abel and the Magic Triangle — “Turn fear into confidence, one step at a time.” A character series, not a curriculum with a worldview attached.

The five sessions

  1. Session 1

    Read the story and find the wall the child is standing under

  2. Session 2

    Commit out loud, before anybody feels ready — that is step one

  3. Session 3

    Do the reps, count them, and expect them to be ugly

  4. Session 4

    Name what got better, using the count and not a feeling

  5. Session 5

    Confidence is the last step, and it is earned in front of them

Questions leaders ask

Is fear of trying in your area a religious program?

No. Ellis Abel is a character series. Each volume carries one named core value — this one is confidence — and the story does the teaching. There is no doctrine in it, nothing to opt out of, and it is used in public schools, libraries and secular programs as readily as anywhere else.

What ages does this work for?

Ages 4-12. The story is read aloud, so a child who cannot read yet is fully in it, and the discussion prompts are written in two bands so one adult can hold a mixed-age room.

We have tried things like this in your area before and stopped. Why is this different?

Because it is ten minutes and it survives a missed night. There is no streak to break and nothing to catch up on — you pick up at the next chapter.

What if my child will not talk about it?

Then read it anyway and say nothing. Children answer days later, in the car, about something else entirely. The prompts are there when they are ready, not a toll you have to pay to finish the book.

The rules that make it work

Confidence is earned, in that order, every time

Commitment, then competency, then confidence. Almost every adult teaches it backwards by trying to install the feeling first, and children can tell.

Ugly reps are the work, not a warning sign

A child promised that practice feels good quits on the third attempt. Say in advance that it will look bad, and the bad-looking part stops meaning anything.

Praise the count, never the talent

"You're a natural" is a compliment a child cannot use and cannot rebuild from. Sixty reps is a fact they own and can do again.

Nobody is compared to anybody

The count is against last week's count. A room where children are ranked teaches the ones at the bottom to stop starting.

Adults commit out loud too

A coach or a parent naming a thing they are bad at and are practising anyway is worth more than any session on effort.

This is a character story, not a performance program

Technique belongs to the coach and the teacher. This handles the part that has nothing to do with technique, and never scores a child on either.

Fear of Trying by metro area

Northeast

Midwest

South

West

Cities and all 3,143 US counties are covered too — every place page is live. The campaign sitemap lists every one.

Related programs

Quitting Too Soon icon — Ellis Abel Learns Book 3, confidence, for children ages 5-13Quitting Too SoonAges 5-13Perfectionism icon — Ellis Abel Learns Book 3, confidence, for children ages 6-14PerfectionismAges 6-14Fear of Failure icon — Ellis Abel Learns Book 3, confidence, for children ages 5-14Fear of FailureAges 5-14Homework Avoidance icon — Ellis Abel Learns Book 3, confidence, for children ages 6-13Homework AvoidanceAges 6-13Learning to Ride a Bike icon — Ellis Abel Learns Book 3, confidence, for children ages 4-9Riding a BikeAges 4-9Swimming Lessons icon — Ellis Abel Learns Book 3, confidence, for children ages 3-10Swimming LessonsAges 3-10Stage and Test Nerves icon — Ellis Abel Learns Book 3, confidence, for children ages 6-14NervesAges 6-14Trying Out for a Team icon — Ellis Abel Learns Book 3, confidence, for children ages 8-16Trying Out at HomeAges 8-16Practice Habits icon — Ellis Abel Learns Book 3, confidence, for children ages 5-14Practice HabitsAges 5-14Growth Mindset at Home icon — Ellis Abel Learns Book 3, confidence, for children ages 5-13Growth Mindset at HomeAges 5-13Comparing Themselves to Others icon — Ellis Abel Learns Book 3, confidence, for children ages 5-14ComparingAges 5-14

The rest of the series

Book 1AccountabilityBig feelings. Small choices. Real accountability.Book 2BelongingBeing brave means showing up anyway.Book 4DiscernmentChoose what you feed within.Book 5EmpathyWhat matters more than earning a Gold Star?Book 6FaithDifference isn’t weakness. It’s a gift.